So I finally sat down and wrote the first chapter of the story I am writing with you.
If you are a new reader and you have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about check THIS post out.
I loved all of the suggestions you gave me. They are awesome!
I couldn't choose just one. So I decided to use them all!
I also decided I'll dedicate a chapter to the person who's suggestion I used the most.
This chapter, it is Tanya! You can find her blog over HERE
She said: "A person (Boy or girl) who wakes up one morning to find that his/her alarm clock hasn't gone off yet to wake up for school. He/she waits for a few minutes and realizes that the time hasn't moved forward -it's frozen on 6:57AM. He/She has to find the source of the problem, and everyone (with the exception of a few people that help the MC) is also frozen."
Thanks Tanya!
Okay. Without any further ado..... Here it is ladies and gentlemen..... The FIRST chapter of, something I 'cleverly' titled, THE BLOG STORY!!!!!!!
(Hope you like it!)
---X---
Jake woke up
feeling totally refreshed, a feeling he didn’t normally experience first thing
in the morning, and definitely not when he had spent most of his sleeping time
reading comic books by flashlight.
He sat up and stretched
his arms and looked at his alarm clock. It read 6:59. He was supposed to wake
up in one minute, so he decided to wait it out. But the clock never changed to
7:00. After a few minutes Jake realized this and jumped out of bed as fast as
he could. He was late for school!
He dressed as
fast as he could and ran down the stairs to grab something to eat before he rushed to
school. Then he remembered his mom and dad were probably still sleeping, since
they didn’t come to wake him up, so he rushed to their room. No one was there.
Jake was
confused, why would his mom and dad go to work before waking him up? He didn’t
have time to think though, he was really late. He ran down the stairs again and
froze when he entered the kitchen. His heart sank right to his feet.
There, by the
kitchen table, was his mother, her arm was frozen in mid air as she was about
to place an apple in Jake’s lunch sack. She wasn’t moving. Not even a bit.
Jake looked
around the room and spotted his dad, who was also frozen. He was packing his
suitcase for work.
Then Jake realized
how quiet it was. Not a sound could be heard except his own breathing. It was
very eerie. He cautiously walked over to his mom and touched her arm. He
gasped. Her body was warm, as that of a normal living person. He ran to his
dad’s side and touched his arm too. It was also warm. Then Jake looked at the
microwave clock. It read 6:59. He rushed to every clock he could think of in
his house. All of them weren’t ticking. All of stopped at the exact same spot.
And all of them read 6:59.
Jake fainted.
---X---
Jake didn’t know
how much time passed since he had fainted, and he couldn’t very well look at a
clock to see, but he didn’t think it was too long. He checked on his mom and
dad again, who was still frozen, and decided to find some help. As he was about
to go down the porch steps something caught his eye.
A box just sat
there on the porch. It was covered in brown wrapping paper and it had his name,
in big fat marker letters, written all over it.
Jake called out
to the street but not a sound was heard. The entire street was still eerily quiet.
Jake gathered up courage and approached the brown box, still waiting patiently
for him. His mind started playing tricks on him.
“What if it’s a bomb?”
He thought to himself. “It could blow
up as soon as I open it up.”
Jake carefully
put his ear to the box to listen for any sounds, he couldn’t hear anything. But
that didn’t prove that there wasn’t a bomb. Not yet anyway.
“Jake, you’ll just have to man up and open that box!” He commanded
himself.
Jake picked up
the box. It was heavy. He carefully tore off all the wrapping paper off and stared
at the now uncovered box. He could hear his heart beating loudly in his ears,
and his breathing started to quicken slightly.
“Come on Jake!” He said to himself. “It’s just a box, it
can’t hurt you.” As much as he wanted to believe himself he was still afraid.
Jake carefully
placed his fingers on the box lid and took a deep breath. Slowly he lifted it.
What he saw surprised him.
There was no
timer with big red numbers telling him when it would blow up. No wires he would
have to worry about cutting. Indeed, there was no bomb. But there was
something.
Jake lifted out an
envelope which was also addressed to him. He opened it and started reading.
Dear Jake.
If you are reading
this it must mean time has frozen, for all except you.
Or so you think.
All around the world select individuals, such
as yourself, finds themselves in the same situation as you.
Time is frozen.
It is your duty,
Jake, to fix this again. In your box you will find a smaller box containing a
watch. This is your countdown timer. If those numbers reach zero you, and
everyone on earth, WILL DIE.
Your first
instruction is to find the others. Together you have to work to save the earth.
The timer is equipped
with a GPS, which you will use to find the others.
There is also a
bunch of tools you may need during your mission.
A knife, compass,
first aid kit, and some energy bars to keep up your strength.
Use them wisely.
Keep a lookout for
your next letter.
Mr. X
Jake looked back
in the box he found the timer and stared at it. It read “197 hours, 15 minutes,
and 39 seconds.” He quickly did some maths. This gave him just over eight days
to save the earth.
Jake ran back to inside to his room with his
new gear and packed them in a backpack. He also packed some other things, like
a sweatshirt, extra socks, and a box of matches. He went to the kitchen pantry
and packed some crackers, chips, cookies, and a few water bottles. Now he had
only one more thing he had to do.
He needed to find
the others.
---X---
Okay, there you have it. The first chapter!
Tell me what you thought of it in the comments.
Remember too also suggest what should happen next. Like, who should Jake find first, and what their next mission should be. I can't post the next chapter without you!
Tell your friends about this too, if you think they'll like it. There's always room for more people over here!
Well that's all for now!
~DFTBA
I like it. It sounds really cool
ReplyDelete:D
DeleteWow! Megan cool!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sasha!
DeleteLove it! Well done :) Jake finds a girl called Sarah who is one of the 'others'. The only thing is, she has a timer just like his, but it's got much less time left. Sarah only has 46 hours left, and together they try to solve the problem of why their timers have different countdowns. Eventually they realize that as long as they're together, their timers join and their time becomes more -both of their timers added together. Now they have to stay within a kilometer radius of each other, otherwise their timers count down faster than when they are together, and time is very precious. If you want to use this idea, you're welcome. If not, no worries :) Once again, great beginning!
ReplyDeleteI like your ideas Tanya! :D
DeleteYou're a great writer! You will be posting the whole story on your blog? (LOVE the idea for the plot!)
ReplyDeleteThanks!
DeleteYes I will be posting the whole story on my blog. It is kind of a creative challenge for me.
I want to see what I can do when I don't really know what will happen next. All my other stories has a basic plot. I know where I want it to go. This one I have to let the reader decide everything. But it is kind of fun not to know what will happen next, its like I get to read it with my readers. :D
Another idea for a new character/characters could be twins. Either a boy and girl or two girls, or two boys. They should maybe come from London, England, (or any other place). Then they find the others and they have a bit more time left...
ReplyDeleteOne of the others is a talking cat... I love talking animals.... Love your story my girl!
ReplyDelete